“It Is Enough, the Light Still Shines” read by Demian
I want to write for the person who needs me
I want to be the stranger who opens her door to the homeless mother of two, after a friend closes their door in her face.
I want to be the stories of other survivors that she reads, night after night, seeking validation, seeking assurance she isn’t crazy, after all.
I want to be the song she hears, sitting in the car, reminding her that unconditional love is out there, searching for her as much as she seeks to be found.
I want to be that lamp, with its bent frame and broken glass, shining its light with ferocity and love.
And if the only thing I illuminate is my brokenness, I want to say, “It is enough. The light still shines.”
And then I will know I have succeeded, despite everything, the battle field, and the casualties.
I will mourn them all, including the blood on my hands.
The light shines.
Because even if it’s just a twinkle, I may be, to someone from a distance, the light they make a wish on.
Or one of the thousand fireflies, that mother watched through the window, through tears, in a borrowed car, her babies in her arms.
To flash out a message in the night, there is hope. Hang on. Breathe. Past the fear. Past the pain in your heart.
Listen. To your children’s breathing.
Draw up a strength you do not know you have, from the pit of a terror you did not know you’d ever live.
Morning will come. You will drive to a family diner, and you will buy one pancake breakfast, that the cook will make into a teddy bear shape for your kids. And they will smile at you, and eat. And their trust will stab you, and you will smile back, and drink your cup of hot tea.
One day, you will write about this, and you’ll remember a night with a thousand stars, when the whole sky bent down to kiss the trees, and how the magic, pulled you through the night, and how the next morning your children ate an artisan pancake with lots of butter and syrup.
And you’ll remember how you believed you were going to be okay, because you had to, because to believe anything else would be slamming the door in your own face, and your kids.
And that you will not do.
Light the candle. If not for yourself, do it for your babies. If you don’t have any babies, do it for something you love, and if you don’t think you have anything to love, then screw it, just do it for yourself.
Because if you don’t, then you’ll really be in the dark.
And someone needs your light, as much as you do.
From my life to yours,
Demian Elaine’ Yumei ~ Silent No More
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Omg what a delight to hear your voice!!!
Like everything else you write, this piece is so moving and loving and honest. Thank you for showing up fully and openly for us to witness. It’s an honor.
I can feel the warmth of this message-- thank you!!!